today

I don't know how to describe today
full of heartbreak and disappointment
mixed with faith that I know God is up to something beautiful

right now my heart is just in pain
it's a endurance thing though
I gotta endure it.... it just really sucks

just what happened today makes me want that change of scenery so much more

I've been wanting to get away from a place for the past few weeks

and I'm not sure, right now, if it's God's will for me to stay

or if it's God's will for me to leave

my heart right now tells me to leave. . . . .

I'm having a hard time figuring out if it's just my heart in a wounded state
or if me staying is what is putting my heart in a wounded state and God is using the wounded state
to tell me to leave

i'm a little confused at the moment......

and I'm definitely in need of some serious prayer
as I pray that God would empty me and fill me with Him
so that I can go wherever it is He wants me to go
and if staying is what He wants then I'll do that too

If it's not what He wants then I don't need to stay
cause If He isn't here then I need to be wherever He is